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a symphony of pattering rain

September 5, 2008

Last night I fell asleep to a symphony of pattering rain.  Rainy days bring out the romantic in me.  On those days I feel especially close to God.  And so it was last night as I drove from dance practice to the grocery store.  The rain fell at a steady rate.  There is something about the sound of the rain, the cool clean air and the mist from splattering raindrops that I find invigorating.   I am on top of the world these days.  My life is full of things I love: dancing, writing, family, friends.  The romantically dreary day made it all sparkle and glisten.  I had a light heart traipsing the aisles of Meijer at 9:30 at night.

I am so blessed.  The Lord and I both know the desires of my heart, but sometimes I feel guilty acknowledging them.  My life is far from perfect but I have so much already – what right do I have to want more?

“You sound really happy, Cecilia,” my brother Charles said the other day.  I told him that I am – so much so that I have to remind myself not to get too attached to my life.  Charles encouraged me in this.  He reminded me that I need to constantly strive for more in my relationship with the Lord.  Don’t be too content, he said, to the point where you become stagnant.  I have a tendency to mistake my gratitude for contentment.

All of this was swimming in my mind as the rain collected in little pools around me.  My heart was full of gratitude as I ran my errands late last night.  God has been very good to me, and in His generosity He will always want more for me.    I lay in my bed listening to the music God created to lull me to sleep, and I knew I could do no more than thank the Lord for all He has done and be open to whatever He may have on the horizon.

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