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standing vigil 3.0: waiting in joyful hope

October 14, 2008

Waiting is a foreign concept in these modern times with instant everything: instant oatmeal, instant oil change, instant replay, etc.  We have come to expect instant results and instant gratification.  But God is not an instant God.  He works in His own time, at His own pace.

I’ve spent a lot of time this past year reflecting on waiting and learning how to wait, thanks to Fr. Henri Nouwen’s The Spirituality of Waiting.  I have learned that waiting and hope go hand-in-hand.  It is difficult to wait if you have no hope of what you are waiting for.  I was reminded of all this last Thursday night as I stood at the abortion mill praying.

It wasn’t an easy night.  I picked up an extra hour of prayer after a long day at work and an intense two hour dance practice.  I was exhausted mentally and physically, making me an easy target for doubt and despair.  I tried to concentrate on praying, but the questions kept interrupting me: ‘Are we really making a difference?’  ‘Are babies really being saved?’  I know our prayers are never in vain, but I hadn’t seen any results.  I’d heard reports from other cities of mothers choosing life for their babies, of prayer warriors being persecuted, of lives changed, but not much from my own city.

Everything I learned about waiting was put to the test that dark, cold night.  All I have to say is it’s a good thing I’m stubborn or I just might have given in to the doubt.  God gave me the strength to persevere and to have hope that my prayers will have an effect that will manifest itself to me in the future.  I may never know the answer to my prayers until I make it to the other side.  It can be frustrating, but it is also exciting to know that our efforts could have a profound impact and when we get to Heaven, God will reveal how He used us in this fierce battle.

It wasn’t an easy night, but it was good.  I left with renewed hope and determination.  I will wait patiently for the results of my prayers, and what’s more, I will wait in joyful hope.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. mariangrace permalink
    October 15, 2008 4:32 pm

    I really believe God will let you see the fruit of your prayer one day…perhaps in the next life.

  2. mariangrace permalink
    October 15, 2008 4:32 pm

    You just might end up being touched by one of the children your prayer helped save…(I think God likes to work like that).

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