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fabulous football conversations

October 23, 2009

Weekends in my family usually include a football game or two or three. Last weekend we turned on the Ohio State/Purdue game just in time to witness a great play by the Buckeye defense. The OSU player striped the ball from Purdue in one graceful and powerful movement. Rosario and I ooed and ahhed over the replay, while Mom just stared at the screen.

“Is that allowed?” she asked, dismayed. “He just took the ball from that other guy. That doesn’t seem very nice.”

Rose and I looked over at her, our jaws on the ground. “Seriously, Mom?” Rosario asked. “Well football is all about being nice! They always say ‘excuse me’ before running head first into each other.”

Mother has such a good heart, and she doesn’t watch much football with us.

“Of course it’s allowed!” Rose explained. “After all, the entire point is to get the ball so you can score.”

Shortly after that, Dad walked in for an update. “Who are we playin’?” he asked.

“Purdue,” Rose and I said in unison.

“Ooooo. We don’t like them,” he replied.

Rosario and I murmured our agreement, but Mom asked innocently, “Why don’t you like them? What did they ever do to you?”

Dad glared at the screen and said in a disgusted voice, “They exist!”

The rest of the game did not go well for our Buckeyes. I don’t know what their problem was, but it was not what I’ve come to expect from my boys. It was a painful game to watch.

The following Monday, one of my co-workers, who likes to tease me, asked me if I behaved myself over the weekend.

I shook my head. “I was terrible, K-! I should have had my mouth washed out with soap on Saturday.”

She looked at me quite shocked. “Were you naughty?” she asked.

“My sister and I were watching our football team, and they didn’t do so well. I used naughty language,” I confessed.

“Cecilia! That is terrible!”

“I know! But that’s the only time I use colorful language – during football games. And I don’t use really bad words. I only use biblical terms.”

K- looked at me and laughed. “Biblical terms? Really?”

“Well, of course! I only use words that are found in the bible, just like my dad!”

“And that makes everything ok?”

“I guess not, but when the game’s going bad, it just slips out.”

“Well, what did your sister have to say about that? Why didn’t she wash your mouth out with soap?”

“Are you kidding, K-? Her words were worse than mine!”

“What are we going to do with you?” K- shook her head in defeat.

I laughed. I have no problem admitting that I get very passionate during games, and I make no excuses for my use of biblical terms. (Honestly, most people would think my language quite tame during games and it is the only time I use such terms.) But if my boys were able to get their heads in the game, especially the offensive line, I wouldn’t have to go get all religious on them!

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